Small But Mighty: How to Stand Your Ground When Facing Nurse-to-Nurse Bullying
<Photo: When your chihuahua thinks they're a mastiff in the face of a bully>
Small But Mighty: How to Stand Your Ground When Facing Workplace Bullies
It's a scene that plays out in hospitals and healthcare facilities everywhere: a newly licensed nurse gets targeted by an experienced colleague who uses intimidation, mockery, or exclusion to assert dominance. If you've experienced this situation, you're not alone. Healthcare professionals seeking resources for handling workplace conflicts can benefit from educational platforms like EPIC Webinars, which offers training on navigating challenging professional interactions.
Workplace bullying in healthcare is shockingly common, with studies showing that approximately 50% of nursing staff report being victims of bullying at some point in their careers. Newly licensed nurses are particularly vulnerable as they navigate unfamiliar environments while trying to establish their professional identity.
Understanding the Bully-Target Dynamic in Healthcare
The Warning Signs of Bullying Behavior
Workplace bullying can take many forms, some subtle and others overt. Common behaviors include being assigned unmanageable workloads, being deliberately ignored by colleagues, having critical information withheld, and experiencing public humiliation. Unlike occasional conflict or constructive criticism, bullying forms a pattern of behavior designed to undermine your confidence and professional standing.
The perpetrator might interrupt you during patient handoffs with exaggerated sighs or eye-rolling, make dismissive comments like "Didn't they teach you anything in nursing school?", exclude you from important conversations, or assign you the most challenging patients without adequate support. Some bullies might even "forget" to tell you about important changes in patient status or unit protocols, setting you up for failure. Recognizing these patterns early allows you to address them before they escalate.
Why Newly Licensed Nurses Are Often Targeted
New nurses often become targets because they represent change in an established environment. Their fresh education may threaten those who've become comfortable with outdated practices. Additionally, their perceived vulnerability makes them easy targets for those seeking to maintain or assert power within the unit's social hierarchy.
Some seasoned nurses mistakenly believe that harsh treatment is a rite of passage—something they experienced and now perpetuate. "I went through it, so you should too" becomes an unspoken mantra that fuels this cycle of workplace violence. This pattern continues because it's been normalized rather than challenged.
The Impact on Your Professional Confidence
The effects of workplace bullying extend far beyond momentary discomfort. Victims commonly experience burnout, decreased productivity, and a growing mistrust of the organization that fails to protect them. Many develop sleep difficulties, anxiety, and physical symptoms like headaches or digestive issues.
Perhaps most damaging is the erosion of professional confidence. When repeatedly told you're inadequate or incompetent, you may begin to believe it—even when evidence suggests otherwise. This diminished self-assurance can affect patient care and career advancement opportunities.
Workplace bullying undermines the collaborative environment essential to quality healthcare delivery. It creates a toxic atmosphere where fear replaces open communication, potentially compromising patient safety when important information isn't shared or questions go unasked.
The Chihuahua Mindset: Finding Strength in Smallness
The chihuahua - tiny in stature but mighty in spirit - offers the perfect metaphor for how newly licensed nurses can approach workplace bullies. Despite their size, chihuahuas don't cower when confronted by larger dogs. Instead, they stand their ground with unwavering confidence. This same mindset can transform how you handle workplace bullying.
Recognizing Your Professional Value Despite Experience Level
Remember that your nursing license carries the same weight as that of your colleagues with decades of experience. You earned your position through rigorous education and demonstrated competence. While you may lack the years of clinical experience that some of your colleagues have, you bring fresh perspectives, up-to-date education, and a willingness to learn.
Your value isn't diminished by your novice status. In fact, healthcare organizations actively seek newly licensed nurses precisely because they bring current evidence-based practices and adaptability to the workplace. Recognizing this inherent value is the first step toward standing up to workplace bullies.
One newly licensed nurse shared, "When my preceptor constantly belittled my assessment skills, I reminded myself that I had graduated at the top of my class and passed my boards on the first try. Those achievements weren't accidents - they reflected my competence and dedication."
Using Knowledge as Your Superpower
Knowledge is power, especially when facing workplace bullies. Stay current with best practices, hospital policies, and clinical guidelines. When you're confident in your knowledge base, bullying behaviors like questioning your competence become less effective.
Take time to thoroughly understand your organization's policies regarding:
Workplace conduct expectations
Reporting structures for incidents
Anti-bullying initiatives and resources
Chain of command for escalating concerns
Documentation requirements for workplace issues
This information serves as armor when you need to address inappropriate behavior. It also demonstrates to potential bullies that you're well-informed about your rights and the proper channels for addressing workplace issues.
Continuing education isn't just about clinical skills - it's also about developing emotional intelligence and conflict resolution abilities. Consider taking communication courses or workshops offered through professional nursing organizations. These resources can help you develop effective responses to challenging workplace situations.
Turning Perceived Weaknesses Into Strategic Advantages
Your newness, often targeted as a weakness, can actually be your greatest strength. Unlike those entrenched in "the way things have always been done," you bring fresh eyes and recent education to the table. When bullies target your inexperience, reframe it as an asset: "You're right that I haven't been doing this for twenty years. That's why I'm able to bring the most current evidence-based practices to our unit."
Being new also gives you permission to ask questions and seek clarification - skills that experienced nurses sometimes abandon out of fear of appearing unknowledgeable. Your willingness to admit what you don't know and seek guidance reflects professional maturity, not weakness.
Another advantage? You haven't yet developed the cynicism or burnout that sometimes fuels bullying behavior. Your enthusiasm and optimism, while occasionally mocked by jaded colleagues, contribute positively to the workplace environment and patient care.
5 Practical Strategies for Confronting Workplace Bullies
When workplace bullying occurs, having concrete strategies ready can make the difference between being victimized and taking control of the situation. Here are five proven approaches:
1. Setting Clear Professional Boundaries
Establish and communicate your boundaries clearly and early. This might sound like: "I'm open to constructive feedback, but I expect it to be delivered professionally and privately." When someone crosses those boundaries, address it immediately: "The tone you're using isn't productive. I'd be happy to discuss this once we can speak respectfully."
Boundaries aren't just about what you say - they're also about what you're willing to accept. If a colleague consistently undermines you during reports, you might state: "I need to complete my report without interruption. I'll address questions afterward." Then follow through by pausing if interrupted and restating your boundary.
Setting boundaries isn't about being confrontational - it's about establishing mutual respect. Most professional colleagues will respond positively to clearly articulated expectations.
2. Mastering Assertive Communication Techniques
Assertive communication strikes the balance between passive acceptance of mistreatment and aggressive responses that escalate conflict. When communicating assertively, you:
Use "I" statements that focus on the behavior's impact rather than attacking the person
Maintain appropriate eye contact and confident body language
Speak in a calm, steady voice regardless of the other person's tone
State facts rather than making accusations
Clearly articulate what you need going forward
For example, instead of "You're always undermining me," try "I feel frustrated when my assessments are questioned publicly without specific concerns being identified. I would appreciate discussing any issues privately."
Assertive communication takes practice, especially under stress. Consider role-playing difficult conversations with a trusted friend or mentor before having them in real time.
3. Employing Effective De-escalation Responses
When confronted with bullying behavior, de-escalation techniques can prevent the situation from worsening. These include:
Taking a deep breath before responding
Lowering your voice rather than raising it
Acknowledging the other person's concern: "I understand you're concerned about how I handled that situation"
Suggesting a pause if emotions are running high: "This seems like an important conversation. Could we discuss it during our break when we have more time?"
Using reflective listening: "What I hear you saying is..."
Focusing on solutions rather than problems: "How would you suggest we handle this going forward?"
One nurse successfully defused a tense situation by saying, "I can see you're really frustrated right now. I want to address your concerns, but I think we'd both benefit from taking a few minutes to collect our thoughts. Could we meet in the conference room in 15 minutes?"
4. Documenting Incidents Methodically
Documentation serves multiple purposes when addressing workplace bullying. It helps you identify patterns, provides concrete examples when reporting issues, and creates a paper trail if formal action becomes necessary.
For each incident, record:
Date, time, and location
What was said or done (as objectively as possible)
Who was present
The context of the interaction
How you responded
Any impact on patient care or workplace functioning
Keep this documentation private and secure, but readily accessible if needed. Some nurses find it helpful to send themselves emails after incidents, creating a timestamped record they can reference later.
5. Knowing When to Involve Others
While addressing issues directly is often most effective, some situations require additional support. Recognize when to:
Consult with a trusted mentor for guidance
Speak with your manager or supervisor
Contact human resources
Reach out to your union representative, if applicable
File a formal complaint
The key is escalating appropriately. Start with direct communication when possible, then involve your immediate supervisor, followed by higher levels of administration if needed. Persistent bullying that creates a hostile work environment may violate workplace policies or even laws in some jurisdictions.
Building Your Support Network
No one should face workplace bullying alone. Building a strong support network can provide emotional sustenance, practical advice, and when necessary, witnesses to corroborate your experiences. This network serves as both a safety net and a sounding board as you navigate challenging workplace dynamics.
Identifying Allies in Your Department
Look for colleagues who demonstrate empathy, professionalism, and a willingness to speak up. These potential allies might be peers at your experience level or more seasoned staff who mentor rather than bully newcomers.
Pay attention to how they interact with others:
Do they defend colleagues when others speak negatively about them?
Are they willing to share knowledge rather than using it as power?
Do they maintain professional boundaries even in stressful situations?
Have they stepped in when witnessing uncomfortable interactions?
Do they acknowledge others' contributions and successes?
Someone who consistently demonstrates these behaviors likely recognizes the value of a supportive work environment and may become a valuable ally.
Allies don't have to be your closest friends, but they should be individuals you trust to maintain confidentiality and provide honest feedback. Sometimes the quietest person on the unit proves to be the strongest ally because they've been observing dynamics longer than you realize.
Building these relationships takes time. Start with small gestures - offering assistance during busy periods, acknowledging their expertise, or simply engaging in professional conversation during breaks. As trust develops, you can be more direct: "I've noticed you have a good relationship with everyone on the team. I'm finding my footing here and would value your insights."
Creating Mentor Relationships for Guidance
While allies provide peer support, mentors offer wisdom gained through experience. A good mentor can help you distinguish between constructive criticism and bullying, navigate organizational politics, and develop strategies for professional growth despite challenging colleagues.
Mentors might be found within your unit, but don't limit yourself. Consider seeking mentorship from nurses in other departments, former instructors, or through professional nursing organizations. Sometimes the most valuable perspective comes from someone with enough distance to be objective.
When approaching a potential mentor, be specific about what you're seeking: "I admire how you handle difficult conversations with confidence. Would you be willing to meet occasionally to help me develop those skills?" Most experienced professionals are flattered by such requests and welcome the opportunity to guide the next generation.
Effective mentoring relationships include:
Regular, scheduled conversations
Specific goals or topics for discussion
Reciprocal respect for time and boundaries
Confidentiality regarding sensitive issues
A balance of support and challenge
One nurse described her mentor relationship this way: "My mentor helped me see that the bullying wasn't about my competence - it was about the bully's insecurity. That perspective shift allowed me to respond professionally instead of taking the attacks personally."
Leveraging Organizational Resources
Even the most confident chihuahua sometimes needs backup. Understanding and utilizing available organizational resources can provide structural support when individual efforts aren't sufficient.
Understanding Formal Reporting Procedures
Every healthcare organization has established procedures for reporting workplace misconduct, including bullying. Familiarize yourself with these processes before you need them. This information is typically found in employee handbooks, human resources portals, or organizational intranets.
Pay attention to:
Who receives initial reports (direct supervisor, department manager, HR representative)
What format reports should take (verbal, written, specific forms)
Timeframes for investigation and response
Confidentiality protections
Anti-retaliation policies
When making a formal report, stick to facts rather than emotions. Instead of "Susan is constantly mean to me," document "On June 3rd at approximately 2:30 PM, Susan stated in front of patients and staff that my assessment skills were 'dangerously inadequate' without providing specific concerns or examples."
Formal reporting serves multiple purposes: addressing your specific situation, creating a record if patterns emerge, and alerting leadership to potential systemic issues that require broader intervention.
Using Professional Organizations for Support
Professional nursing organizations offer resources specifically designed to address workplace bullying. Organizations like the American Nurses Association (ANA) provide:
Position statements on workplace violence and incivility
Educational materials on recognizing and responding to bullying
Webinars and continuing education on communication and conflict resolution
Networking opportunities with nurses who have navigated similar challenges
Advocacy at institutional and policy levels
Many of these organizations also offer confidential consultation services where you can discuss your situation with an experienced professional who can provide guidance tailored to your circumstances.
Your state nurses association may offer additional local resources, including referrals to legal consultation if the bullying crosses into harassment or discrimination territory.
When Self-Advocacy Isn't Enough: Escalation Pathways
Despite your best efforts at direct communication and documentation, some bullying situations require escalation. Knowing when and how to escalate is crucial.
Consider escalation when:
The bullying behavior continues despite your direct intervention
The behavior affects patient safety or care quality
You experience retaliation after addressing the issue
The bullying crosses into harassment based on protected characteristics
You observe the bully targeting multiple colleagues, suggesting a pattern
Escalation pathways typically follow your organization's chain of command:
Direct supervisor/charge nurse
Unit or department manager
Director of nursing or clinical services
Chief nursing officer
Human resources department
Hospital administration/CEO
Document each step of the escalation process, including who you spoke with, when, and what response you received. If one level doesn't address the concern appropriately, move to the next level, always maintaining professionalism.
If internal escalation proves ineffective, external options might include:
State board of nursing (if the behavior violates nursing practice standards)
Accrediting bodies like The Joint Commission (if the behavior affects organizational standards)
Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (if the bullying constitutes harassment)
Legal counsel (in severe or persistent cases)
One nurse recounted her escalation experience: "After documenting three months of incidents with no response from my manager, I scheduled a meeting with the director of nursing. I brought my documentation, highlighted the specific policies being violated, and explained the impact on both staff and patients. Within a week, the director had implemented unit-wide training on professional communication."
Your Career Is Bigger Than Any Bully: Moving Forward with Confidence
The chihuahua doesn't let its size determine its courage, and neither should you let workplace bullies diminish your professional potential. How you respond to bullying not only affects your current situation but shapes your professional identity going forward.
Many nurses who successfully navigate workplace bullying emerge stronger, more resilient, and better equipped to advocate for themselves and others. They often become the mentors and leaders who change workplace culture for future generations of nurses.
Consider how your experiences might inform your future leadership style. What have you learned about creating psychologically safe environments? How might you onboard and support new team members differently based on your experiences? What policies or procedures would you implement or change?
Some nurses find that facing workplace bullying clarifies their career priorities and values. This clarity can guide future decisions about where to work, what specialties to pursue, and what type of organizational culture aligns with their professional vision.
While you didn't choose to be targeted, you do choose how to respond. By maintaining your professional integrity, documenting effectively, building supportive relationships, and utilizing appropriate resources, you demonstrate the leadership qualities that ultimately distinguish excellent nurses.
Like the chihuahua who stands tall despite its stature, you can navigate workplace bullying with dignity, determination, and the confidence that comes from knowing your true professional worth.
The healthcare profession needs strong, compassionate nurses who advocate for themselves as effectively as they advocate for their patients. By addressing workplace bullying directly and strategically, you contribute to a healthier workplace culture for all healthcare professionals and the patients they serve. EPIC Webinars offers workshops that can help you continue building these essential workplace skills throughout your career.
